Take your eyes off of me so I can leave, I'm far too ashamed to do it with you watching me. This is never ending, we have been here before. But I can't stay this time, cause I don't love you anymore. Please stay where you are, don't come any closer. Don't try to change my mind, I'm being cruel to be kind. I can't love you in the dark, it feels like we're oceans apart. There is so much space between us, maybe we're already defeated. And everything changed me. You have given me something that I can't live without, you mustn't underestimate that when you are in doubt. But I don't want to carry on like everything is fine, the longer we ignore it all the more that we will fight. Please don't fall apart, I can't face your breaking heart. I'm trying to be brave, stop asking me to stay. We're not the only ones, I don't regret a thing, every word I've said you know I'll always mean. It is the world to me that you are in my life, but I want to live and not just survive. That's why I can't love you in the dark, it feels like we're oceans apart. There is so much space between us, maybe we're already defeated. Cause everything changed me. And I don't think you can save me

this too shall pass

You should've been there, should've burst to the door with that "baby, I'm right here" smile. And it would've felt like, a million little shining stars had just aligned, and I would've been so happy. Christmas lights glisten, I've got my eye on the door just waiting for you to walk in. But the time is ticking. People ask me how I've been as I comb back through my memory, how you said you'd be here. You said you'd be here. And it was like slow motion, standing there in my party dress, in red lipstick. With no one to impress. And they're all laughing, as I'm looking around the room. But there was one thing missing. And that was de moment I knew. And the hours pass by, I just wanna be alone, but your close friends always seem to know when there's something really wrong, so they follow me down the hall. And there in the bathroom, I try not to fall apart and the sinking feeling starts as I say hopelessly, "He said he'd be here". And it was like slow motion, standing there in my party dress, in red lipstick. With no one to impress. And they're all laughing, asking me about you. But there was one thing missing. And that was de moment I knew. What do you say when tears are streaming down your face in front of everyone you know? And what do you do when the one who means the most to you, is the one who didn't show? You should've been here. And I would've been so happy. And it was like slow motion, standing there in my party dress, in red lipstick. With no one to impress. And they're all standing around me singing "Happy birthday to you". But there was one thing missing, and that was the moment I knew. You called me later, and said "I'm sorry I didn't make it", and I said "I'm sorry too". And that was the moment I knew.

24/04/2016

I know you're thinking I'm heartless

I know you're thinking I'm cold

I'm just protecting my innocence

I'm just protecting my soul

You're practically my family

If we married then I'll guess you'd have to be

But tragically our love just lost the will to live

But would I kill to give it one more shot

I think not

So I'll watch your life in pictures
like a I used to watch you sleep
And I'll feel you forget me 
like I used to feel you breathe
And I'll keep up with with our old friends
just to ask them how you are
I hope it's nice where you are


Forever the name on my lips

Hola.
Hoy pensé en vos todo el día.
No se mucho por qué, la verdad es que hace mucho no pasaba.
Me dieron ganas de ver fotos nuestras así que empecé a buscar en todas las carpetas viejas, recuerdos que me hagan llegar hasta vos, que me transporten a algún lugar en donde alguna vez fui feliz, con vos, donde fuiste feliz, conmigo, donde fuimos felices.
De todos los momentos es imposible que no se destaque lo peor, hay cosas que se borran pero los momentos tristes parecen durar para siempre en el inconsciente, por más que trate de sacarlos de ahi son los primeros que llegan cuando me acuerdo de nosotros.
No quiero que me perdones si es que hay algo que perdonar, no quiero que todo vuelva a ser como antes, no quiero que estés esperando del otro lado algo que no va a suceder.
Quiero volver un poco el tiempo atrás, y de haber sabido que esa era la última noche...
Hubiera sido todo tan distinto.
Hubiera querido abrazarte una última vez.
Hubiera contemplado como dormías una última vez.
Hubiera visto nuestras fotos en la pared de tu habitación una última vez.
Pero ya no deben estar ahi.
Y ya no vamos a dormir juntos.
Y ya no te voy a abrazar como lo hice durante 5 años.
Y hoy te lloro.
¿Será que la jugué de fuerte y no te lloré lo suficiente?
¿Y por qué hoy? Me pregunto inocente.
Miro a todos lados buscando respuesta y encuentro el calendario... es 4.


Felices 5 años y 8 meses.

Sé que tu mirada se fue

que ya no será como ayer

que te olvidarás de mi voz

Sé que nuestra luz se apagó

y aunque la quise encender

no todo lo pudo el amor

I'm so thankfull I got to grow up with this amazing story. You are a huge part of my teenage years and I'll never forget all the moments I shared with you. Thank you for teaching me about love, trust, commitment, family and friends, and most of all for letting me know that the people we love are always with us, inside our hearts. I'll always love all of you.

 This 8 years were epic. 

I see my future in your eyes